The Inmates Run the Asylum

It's really starting to set in that next week will be the last week of a regular paycheck and then I'll be depending on what work DaLette can get me and how well I can sell my jewelry and my self-published book of short stories.

Yeah, I'm terrified.

If this doesn't work, I'll be back in the market for a day job, looking like a fool. It'll be just another in a long list of failures I've committed in my time. It's hard to be a success when you're rather mediocre and not very good at anything.

Anyway, I'm feeling a little anxious because it doesn't feel like a week is going to be enough time to get this show off the ground. The jewelry website should be ready, but the book is going to take a bit longer. I won't be getting any work from DaLette until October, so I've got a whole month to really work on building up the other two projects and getting them going.

I'm still terrified.

This could all work well if I were a different person, but I'm so reluctant to sell myself or anything I do. I feel like I'm being annoying when I try to put myself and my work out there. I'm not as smooth and charming as so many other people I know. Promotion is the key to making this work. Getting the message out to as many people as possible will go a long way to helping this work.

I've got the websites. I've ordered business cards. I plan on setting up pages on Facebook. I plan on using Twitter. If anyone would like to help me spread the word about the jewelry, I'd be happy to send you a freebie along with some business cards to pass out to people you think might be interested. I don't know what kind of deal I could work out on the book yet, but I'll think of something. Any help anyone could offer, I'd be grateful.

I'm doing this.

Yep. Terrified.

I've got several friends over on the Facebook that I went to school with back in the day. A couple of them I barely remember and a few I don't know why they friended me because they were more my sister's friends than mine and I didn't even know they knew me.

One of those latter type friends messaged me during my great Internet outage. I finally got back to him (after I remembered who he was; he changed his last name for some reason, but when he told me his old last name, I remembered him...sort of) and we messaged back and forth a bit. And then he asked me if I had ever been married or was dating anyone.

So I got Carrie involved because that question confused me. I mean I know I've never been married and I know I'm not dating anyone, but why does he want to know?

Carrie explained that since he's my age and recently divorced, he's probably fishing to get back into the dating game. And I started whining "Why me?" because really, why me? If we had interacted more back in school, maybe I could see it, but I don't even remember hanging out with him much. (And I have resisted the urge to text my sister and ask her if I hung out with him via her because that happened a lot in high school. I think she's sick of me asking her why I know these people that friend me.)

After some discussion, I answered him. He asked why I was single. I asked Carrie if he thought he was doing an expose for Hermit's Magazine. Whaddya mean, why?

Again more discussion. Again, I answered him. I told him I'd taken myself out of the dating scene a few years ago (true) and that it wasn't a real high priority for me right now (sort of true; better than saying I'm lazy). Then I switched the topic.

He followed my switch, let my single status go, and I thought we were done.

Then he asked if I got up to Bloomington much and I realized that he hadn't given up. So once again I answered him honestly and told him that I get up there occasionally because I've got family up there.

And then he said that we should get a drink sometime? The question mark was his, not mine.

So, I said, yeah, maybe sometime.

And I've not heard from him since. Apparently, kinda sorta saying yes, but not really committing to anything was just too much for him. Or it was a turn off. I don't know.

I'm just glad this all played out online and not in person. Trust me, I am waaaaaaay worse in person than I am online. At least online I can get a second opinion before I commit to making an ass of myself.

I have a Facebook now.

Don't judge me.