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whiski_sourMimzie and the nieces came down for dinner with me, Carrie, and Dad. It was a trip, as it always is.
For those of you playing the home game, just a reminder that Hammie is 7, Hobbit is 5, and Smurf is 4.
At dinner, I'm sitting between Hobbit and Smurf.
Smurf: *blows on her mac and cheese; it goes everywhere*
Me: *wiping mac and cheese off my pants* I'll make you a deal. I'll share my fries with you if you stop blowing mac and cheese on me.
Smurf: Okay. *She then proceeds to eat most of my fries*
Me: *to Smurf* I think I'll sell you to the zoo where you can fling your poo to your heart's delight.
Smurf: No!
Me: We should go to the zoo, though. I promise I won't leave you there.
Hobbit: You should.
Smurf has a vanilla moustache from her milkshake.
Me: You've got a moustache. We need to teach you to shave.
Smurf: I don't have a moustache! *wipes her mouth on a napkin then points at her milkshake* See! It was this!
At home.
Smurf: *to me* I'm going to your room.
Me: Fine. Don't touch my stuff.
Smurf: *sighs dramatically* I'm not.
We go outside to catch fireflies and play tag. I'm it.
Hammie: You can't run! You're an aunt!
Me: I couldn't run before I was an aunt.
Playing hide and seek. Smurf is helping me find the other two girls.
Smurf: *chasing her sisters across the backyard, pumping her fist in the air* Rock and roll!
Playing freeze tag in the front yard. You have to unfreeze people by crawling through their legs. Are you seeing the dilemma here?
Me: *tries to unfreeze Hammie; only gets my head and an arm through, good enough*
Smurf: *tags me as I'm getting up; my earring goes flying*
Me: Hold it! I lost my earring!
Carrie: *probably pisses herself laughing*
Smurf starts her whiny-crying.
Me: What happened?
Hammie: *casually* Oh, I just accidentally fell on her.
Other highlights include Carrie asking my dad if he had a flashlight (my dad's flashlight collection is an ongoing joke that Carrie has witnessed and participated in); the girls crawling through the grass, looking for my earring; the girls playing with my dad's walking sticks; Hobbit kicking her shoes off while running; Smurf naming a huge spider dangling from our porch light McDonald; and Hobbit losing her shoes right when Mimzie was getting ready to take them home. They were found in the front yard, damn near in the neighbor's yard.
And, of course, the girls left me with yet another thing I never thought I'd say and that you will probably never hear said in your own house.
"No one is leaving this house until you find the knob to my closet door."
For those of you playing the home game, just a reminder that Hammie is 7, Hobbit is 5, and Smurf is 4.
At dinner, I'm sitting between Hobbit and Smurf.
Smurf: *blows on her mac and cheese; it goes everywhere*
Me: *wiping mac and cheese off my pants* I'll make you a deal. I'll share my fries with you if you stop blowing mac and cheese on me.
Smurf: Okay. *She then proceeds to eat most of my fries*
Me: *to Smurf* I think I'll sell you to the zoo where you can fling your poo to your heart's delight.
Smurf: No!
Me: We should go to the zoo, though. I promise I won't leave you there.
Hobbit: You should.
Smurf has a vanilla moustache from her milkshake.
Me: You've got a moustache. We need to teach you to shave.
Smurf: I don't have a moustache! *wipes her mouth on a napkin then points at her milkshake* See! It was this!
At home.
Smurf: *to me* I'm going to your room.
Me: Fine. Don't touch my stuff.
Smurf: *sighs dramatically* I'm not.
We go outside to catch fireflies and play tag. I'm it.
Hammie: You can't run! You're an aunt!
Me: I couldn't run before I was an aunt.
Playing hide and seek. Smurf is helping me find the other two girls.
Smurf: *chasing her sisters across the backyard, pumping her fist in the air* Rock and roll!
Playing freeze tag in the front yard. You have to unfreeze people by crawling through their legs. Are you seeing the dilemma here?
Me: *tries to unfreeze Hammie; only gets my head and an arm through, good enough*
Smurf: *tags me as I'm getting up; my earring goes flying*
Me: Hold it! I lost my earring!
Carrie: *probably pisses herself laughing*
Smurf starts her whiny-crying.
Me: What happened?
Hammie: *casually* Oh, I just accidentally fell on her.
Other highlights include Carrie asking my dad if he had a flashlight (my dad's flashlight collection is an ongoing joke that Carrie has witnessed and participated in); the girls crawling through the grass, looking for my earring; the girls playing with my dad's walking sticks; Hobbit kicking her shoes off while running; Smurf naming a huge spider dangling from our porch light McDonald; and Hobbit losing her shoes right when Mimzie was getting ready to take them home. They were found in the front yard, damn near in the neighbor's yard.
And, of course, the girls left me with yet another thing I never thought I'd say and that you will probably never hear said in your own house.
"No one is leaving this house until you find the knob to my closet door."
