whiski_sour | It's kind of like a giant slip and slide really

So my day really began at 6:30 when I woke up to go to the bathroom and spent quite a bit of time trying to get back to sleep. Once I did, I dreamt I was in a co-ed prison with a girl I knew from high school as my lesbian lover. Then the dream jumped to me riding in a car with some lady who was supposedly my dad's girlfriend and she hit a parked car which rolled into a fire hydrant and flooded a school yard. She called the police and then got some fishing poles. The dream jumped a final time to me riding around town on the back of a kangaroo. It was then my alarm went off and woke me up. I was rather pissed as I didn't get to finish my kangaroo ride.

After getting ready, I left the house in the wind and rain and trucked on up to Bloomington to find that because of the weather Mummy and I were splitting up. She'd take Hobbit to get her pictures taken and I'd take Hammie (who's got a cold that comes with much snot) to Borders.

At this point, the rain had become a nice stinging sleet and my car's defroster was being half assed. Hammie and I made it to Borders, confirmed they didn't have my book, bought nice glittery Christmas cards, she told me Harry Potter was Peter Pan, and we were off once again.

Got back to Mummy's house and waited for her to get back and make lunch. Not long after we got home, some of the sleet had become snow. Not long after Mummy got home, it was all snow.

The stepdad came home for lunch, we had tacos, and he told me that the snow didn't look like it was sticking to the roads much. Of course, now Santa will bring him lumps of coal for being wrong.

He left and then I left.

In the maybe 45 minutes since I got back from Borders, I had a nice layer of snow on my car. Not ordinary snow. Wet, slushy, stick-to-everything snow. I proceeded to scrape it off my car and get soaked (and numb in places) in the process. I get in the car and wait for my defroster to catch up and while I do, the big clumps of snow that had gotten on my hair that I didn't know about started to melt and drip down the back of my neck and down my shirt. I started making cranky Sideshow Bob noises at this point.

Start driving home. Some of the stop lights are out because of the wind and snow. However, the normally fishtailing fuckwits who've lived in Illinois all their lives and still don't know how to drive in the snow apparently all stayed home. Everyone I encountered on the highway drove like intelligent human beings. I was in awe.

By the time I got to Heyworth, I found out it hadn't snowed there yet. It was still just raining/sleeting. On the south side of Wapella, it started to snow again. So I'm beebopping along to "Celebration" by Kool and the Gang, get in the turn lane to go into town, apply the brakes, and start to slide. Unlike most normal human beings that have a fully fuctional self preservation part of the their brain, I didn't panic. Instead I sighed irratibly, shifted into neutral, and coasted to a safe stop. I suppose I've just been driving in shitty weather with idiots for too long. I just can't get excited unless I'm actually sliding sideways into that tanker truck filled with gasoline.

I proceed to cruise through town and turn at the police station to head towards the gas station so I can fill up for my trip down south for Thanksgiving tomorrow. As I'm turning, I start to slide once again, but quickly manage to recover just a mere foot before hitting my dad's jeep parked on the street. This left me giggling madly as I pictured the kind of conversation and subsequent submission to the insurance company it would have led to.

I get to the gas station and am quickly aggravated by stupid people. Wet slushy demon snow coming down on you in buckets is no time to dick around, people.

Finally got home to find my cats chasing snowflakes through the front window. Because I can't have normal animals, you see.

Changed clothes and put things away and checked the mail and settled in front of the computer to talk to

one_more_cherry. The phone rings and I run to get it. It's Mummy, calling to see that I made it home okay because my stepdad was worried as the roads were much worse than he thought. Santa then decided to give stepdad real presents again. While on the phone with Mummy, the power goes out for a minute. She calls back, I tell her what happened, confirm I am safe and all is right with the world.

Now I'm off to do dishes. I forsee a nap in my future as well as filling out Christmas cards and patching a pair of jeans. No more going outside, unless it's to greet my father with a slushy snowball to the head.