Lesbians are confusing

[whiski_sour]

I just called Mummy to let her know that I'd be stopping by Friday on my way up to Chicago to drop off her Mother's Day present (yeah, I know...way late).

Mummy: Oh, I was just about to call you to see if you could come up Saturday.
Me: *is suddenly wary* Why?
Mummy: Your Aunt Mary-Ann is coming up.
Me: Really? Cool. Yeah, I'll be there. But, there's no promises on me being coherent.
Mummy: That's fine. Grandma and Uncle John will be here, too.
Me: So, it's to be torture.
Mummy: Yes.

So Saturday I'll be going to see my Aunt Mary-Ann and her ex-lesbian lover, Patty...who's now married to a man.

*boggles* My family never tells me anything. I knew about the break-up and actually thought Mary-Ann and Patty were no longer speaking. Had no idea about Patty getting married or that they were friends again. I just knew that the break up was so hard on Mary-Ann she started abusing pain killers and had to be put into rehab.

It's like I called my mom and suddenly got thrust into the middle of an episode of Gays of Our Lives. I've got no clue what's going on.

The whole family is a bunch of gossips, yet I manage to always be the last to know. They obviously hate me.

Comments

[waterdaughter.livejournal.com]

Lesbians ARE crazy. It's the cliche-joke- the breakup, nuclear war, and then back to being best friends. (Along with the 'what does a lesbian bring to the second date? A: A U-Haul' joke...)

Good luck on Saturday. ;)

Also, Gays of Our Lives! *wanders off snickering madly*

[whiski_sour]

All I could think was, "I don't remember the break up with my girlfriend being this nuts."

Never heard the U-Haul joke before. That's pretty good. I'll have to keep that in mind. Heh.

[one-more-cherry.livejournal.com]

James Riley would murder to put something like that on Days ;-)

Missy

[whiski_sour]

Heh. I'll sell him the story.

[one-more-cherry.livejournal.com]

Well, that only leaves one question: how do you feel about premature burials?

(I swear; these are actual DOOL stories)

WL,
Missy