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Nov. 4th, 2011 11:15 pmCarrie and I went to see The Three Muskateers last night. I think this might be the first movie I've seen in the theater this year. I can't remember seeing anything else.
Because we didn't do anything for her birthday, I promised her that I'd go see a movie with her (something I rarely do) provided that it wasn't of the Twilight variety. She agreed and soon the trailer appeared online for Muskateers and that became her film of choice. I agreed because the trailer she showed me involved Ray Stevenson twiddling his mustache and nothing says, "I'll pay six bucks to see that" for me like mustache twiddling.
I wasn't being sarcastic.
Last night was the first Thursday that the two of us had available to go (we hit the matinee shows on Thursdays because the tickets are 6 bucks and Thursday is bring your own bucket for free popcorn day) and it was also the last day the Eagle was showing it, so it was great timing on our part.
There were only three of us in the whole theater. And the other lady that watched the film sat far enough behind us that she wasn't forced to listen to us do our version of MST3K during the film.
To be honest, the movie wasn't bad if you like bad things (I love bad things). Yes, some of the dialogue was physically painful and the slow motion during the actions scenes was a little annoying and no one brushed D'Artagnan's hair for the duration of the film and there was no real rule for accents, but despite its flaws it was fun. The Muskateers together and Porthos alone had some witty dialogue, the actions scenes for the most part were well done, and Orlando Bloom continues his role in life as Captain Obvious but with the added bonus of making expressions with his face. That all pretty much makes up for it.
If you went to the movie to see some historically accurate, enlightened and faithful rendering of The Three Muskateers, no doubt you would have been seriously disappointed (but, really, the 3-D aspect should have clued you in before you even bought the ticket, so I'm not feeling that sorry for you). D'Artagnan spends most of the movie sporting a 17th century Member's Only jacket. I rest my case.
Speaking of the 3-D, I don't know how anyone could watch that movie that way. It seems like an invitation into motion sickness and vomiting into the popcorn buckets. And I did not bring my bucket for that.
Rumors of the closing credits song being terrible are true. Carrie and I sat through the entire thing and the rest of the credits to find out who was responsible. And then it was decided that the only way the song could have been worse was if Nickelback had done it.
This movie isn't going to end up on my favorites list, but I will admit, it will be one that I watch every time it comes on TV.
The mute button will come in handy.
It's also worth noting that we saw trailers for the latest Spielberg tearjerker; some sci-fi movie with electricity sucking aliens that would have been better done in the 40's with Lon Chaney Jr. as the hero; Sherlock Holmes (MUST SEE!); and Breaking Dawn, which Carrie immediately apologized for. As well she should.
Because we didn't do anything for her birthday, I promised her that I'd go see a movie with her (something I rarely do) provided that it wasn't of the Twilight variety. She agreed and soon the trailer appeared online for Muskateers and that became her film of choice. I agreed because the trailer she showed me involved Ray Stevenson twiddling his mustache and nothing says, "I'll pay six bucks to see that" for me like mustache twiddling.
I wasn't being sarcastic.
Last night was the first Thursday that the two of us had available to go (we hit the matinee shows on Thursdays because the tickets are 6 bucks and Thursday is bring your own bucket for free popcorn day) and it was also the last day the Eagle was showing it, so it was great timing on our part.
There were only three of us in the whole theater. And the other lady that watched the film sat far enough behind us that she wasn't forced to listen to us do our version of MST3K during the film.
To be honest, the movie wasn't bad if you like bad things (I love bad things). Yes, some of the dialogue was physically painful and the slow motion during the actions scenes was a little annoying and no one brushed D'Artagnan's hair for the duration of the film and there was no real rule for accents, but despite its flaws it was fun. The Muskateers together and Porthos alone had some witty dialogue, the actions scenes for the most part were well done, and Orlando Bloom continues his role in life as Captain Obvious but with the added bonus of making expressions with his face. That all pretty much makes up for it.
If you went to the movie to see some historically accurate, enlightened and faithful rendering of The Three Muskateers, no doubt you would have been seriously disappointed (but, really, the 3-D aspect should have clued you in before you even bought the ticket, so I'm not feeling that sorry for you). D'Artagnan spends most of the movie sporting a 17th century Member's Only jacket. I rest my case.
Speaking of the 3-D, I don't know how anyone could watch that movie that way. It seems like an invitation into motion sickness and vomiting into the popcorn buckets. And I did not bring my bucket for that.
Rumors of the closing credits song being terrible are true. Carrie and I sat through the entire thing and the rest of the credits to find out who was responsible. And then it was decided that the only way the song could have been worse was if Nickelback had done it.
This movie isn't going to end up on my favorites list, but I will admit, it will be one that I watch every time it comes on TV.
The mute button will come in handy.
It's also worth noting that we saw trailers for the latest Spielberg tearjerker; some sci-fi movie with electricity sucking aliens that would have been better done in the 40's with Lon Chaney Jr. as the hero; Sherlock Holmes (MUST SEE!); and Breaking Dawn, which Carrie immediately apologized for. As well she should.
