I'm laughing at your pain.

In regards to the recent snowy weather, the state police say people should "slow down and use common sense".

Excuse me a moment.

BWAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

What are you? New? Drivers in Illinois don't have any common sense. And the only time they slow down is when it's completely unnecessary.

I thought that was one of the rules they first taught you guys when you were rookies.

Enjoy filling out all of those accident reports, guys.