Castle...and Papa

[whiski_sour]

It's like Goldilocks only more deathier.

"You know who kills with syrenges? Mad doctors and B-movie nazis." And I've seen most of those films.

That's pretty clever, taking pictures so he can put things back the way they were. Too bad he didn't get to do it in this particular instance.

That's right, boys. Hold it over his head. I love Esposito and Ryan. Truly.

"Why would he be living in these people's places? He had a place out in Hoboken." You just answered your own question there, Brother-in-Law.

You are making yourself looking more guilty, Castle. You'd better pull it back a bit there, babe.

Who is this girl? She looks familiar.

The squatter fixed her sink and left booze? Can he come hang at my house.

BUSTED! Outed by the familar looking girl. And you thought you skated, Castle.

Oh, don't date that girl. She's a Carly from General Hospital. She's no good for people who aren't gangsters or Jax.

"People put a hold on their papers to avoid break-ins." "Good use of irony." I love when he brings a little writer geek to the table.

"I have no life." "No, Mr. Bishop has no life. That's why he's on my table."

Beckett is trying to score a date. So Laney does autopsies and matchmaker. I need a friend like that.

Oh, God. Poor Alexis. People giving her numbers to hand off to her dad. Yeah, I'd hate him a little, too.

Is the squatter wearing that hat because he's a newsboy or because he's stylish?

No wonder Castle couldn't come up with a story for this because this story was just something else. What I don't know.

"He's a nice guy." "So was Jeffrey Dahmer. Didn't stop him from eating people." True and funny.

Beckett is flipping her hair. Oh, she's such a girl.

"I'm telling you, bro. Puppies. Gets them every time." "Puppies." Esposito and Ryan are a dream team, for sure.

So, dueling dates? Is that what's going on here, kids?

That was a girly scream of surprise.

Well, when you have a badass looking scar like that, you definitely don't want to waste it. You can either be a criminal or a misunderstood tough guy with a heart of gold.

Excellent put together of clues, but a pet shop? They're stealing parakeets now? Oh, bank robbery. That's very heist film.

Esposito and Ryan are the instigators I need on my side. We could have so much fun and get into so much trouble together.

Alexis fretting over her dad is so cute. And deep frying a turkey is dangerous business. I know. I watched a group of drunks do it. Somehow they kept their eyebrows.

Like we all didn't know that wasn't going to happen.

Beckett looks really nice. Love that dress. On her, not on me.

You guys are really failing at your dates. "You wanna have sex with me later?" Yeah, totally failing at your dates.

Nice short sleeved shirt, Esposito. Way to show off the guns. And work in a Snakes on a Plane reference. You are on it tonight, pretty boy.

"Do they know they're finishing each other's sentences?" It's like their twins...or teenage girls.

"Castle, hold my purse." You should be used to that after two marriages, my friend.

That is a very pretty, very large spider. Just saying.

Diamond smuggling inside snakes. Poor snakes.

I've noticed a trend. The killer is almost always one of the first people Beckett and Castle meet. It's like a wrestling match. The guy that gets the first pin almost always ends up winning the match. It all comes back to gimmicks and kayfabe, doesn't it?

Good for you, Squatter. You get probation and you get to keep your jaunty hat.

I'd take burgers and shakes over a fancy dinner any day.

I saw you twirling your hair there, Beckett. But it's nice how neither one of you will take credit for your dating fail.


In other, non-murder mystery related news, Papa's back in the hospital. Still having trouble with the pneumonia and the fluid, but he's got a laptop and the hospital has wireless, so he's toughing it out. Dad visited him today and said he was in pretty good spirits.

Papa sent me an email while Dad was there that simply said: You owe me for babysitting your dad.

So I replied: You're not babysitting him. I'm loaning him to you.

Yeah, I'd say Papa is doing okay. Heh.